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[26 Oct 2006|09:49pm] |
sigh. 114-116. my weight keeps fluctuating. c'est la vie. right now i'm focusing more on maintaining than losing. i'll have to wait until december when i'm off school. i can't fast or restrict when i need to think, because i'm braindead when i fast/restrict. i'll do it though- i have to do it. until then i can'tncan'tcan't gain anything.
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[16 Jul 2006|10:02pm] |
125125125125. ugh. and i binged. at 5'91/2 it's an okay weight but i still hatehatehatehatehate myself. why do i eat so much? the comments at prom of "omg you are too skinny" didn't help me either because i'm /not/ skinny and i felt lacking, like eating the banquet dinner made me a failure. i look in the mirror and i see FAT. it makes me so depressed. and so today i ate chocolate. in june my school is doing a 24 hour fast, and so i have an excuse not to eat. my parents can't force me to eat then. maybe i'll get away with telling them it's a 48 hours fast =/
i'm off to exercise. sigh. maybe i'll be able to burn off some of the bajillion calories & fat i consumed today.
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[26 Jun 2006|07:01pm] |
i have not been doing well lately. but luckily i haven't gone up or anything. sigh. i hate ugly weather, and being sick, and weight plateau's. c'est la vie. i almost made myself sick a couple times, but i just couldn't do it. i think i was kind of relieved i couldn't.
prom is coming up, and i need a tan =/ i'll probably have to go to a tanning salon.
and ahhhhh... bikini season is coming up! i've really gotta push myself.
hope everyone is doing well! <3
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[24 May 2006|05:32pm] |
May 12th- prom. goal= 120 lb.
7 pounds!!
edit: gonna try for 115 *crosses fingers* heres hoping.
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